Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Well I just put wine in my tea
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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