Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
bring money and cleavage
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Randomize
