make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
