I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
accomplished twins. life is a go
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
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her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
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Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
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