whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
