you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Randomize
