new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
