I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize
