do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
i think i just lost a toe
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
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