Having a random hookup so left but love u
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Randomize
