Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Randomize
