dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
