You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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