Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
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