so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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