Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
