Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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