it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
