It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
