Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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