so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
