Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize