dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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