Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
drinking out of a sandbucket again
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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