Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
im six kinds of drunk right now
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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