i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Randomize
