Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
You pole danced in your parka.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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