I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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