he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
