JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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