I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
