it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize
