hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
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