just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
