i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
