oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Randomize
