windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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