I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
