How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
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I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
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