ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
