i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
It's never too late to be topless.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize
