Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Threesome in a minivan. New low
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
