he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
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I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
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Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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