forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
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