He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Randomize
