Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
So here I am, sexting at work.
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