I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
