Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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