My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
