So drunk, too bad you don't want this
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
