how can u be prego again
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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